The trend to having your wedding on the tropical island of Barbados, as well as
honeymoon here, probably started in the late 1990s and in those ten years there
have been approximately 15,000 marriage ceremonies performed somewhere in
Barbados, making it a number one destination for weddings.
You could get married on a sandy beach, in a beautifully restored plantation
home or a church that's over 200 years old, at a five star hotel or go under
water. There are so many options that you may find it difficult to decide. In
which case you would be wise to call in reinforcements...
...companies who specialize in wedding planning. As well, many hotels offer wedding packages which may include everything. Wedding planners may also give you the option of creating your own wedding.
We have provided lots of information and resources on the following pages - from applying for your license, to who could perform the marriage ceremony, churches that you can contact, wedding consultants, photographers, hotels and restaurants and all the vendors you would need to truly enjoy a worry-free wedding.
The budget of your wedding in Barbados can run anywhere from $500.00 and up if you decide on a hotel's wedding package. You could decide to go this route or hire a wedding consultant or you may want to plan everything yourself.
Here's a list of exiting places to get married:
barefoot on the beach
in a garden
in a villa
in a submarine
on a golf course
aboard a yacht
If you arrive on Barbados by cruise ship, and your greatest wish is to have a Barbados wedding or renew your wedding vows, Bridgetown Cruise Terminals (http://www.bridgetowncruiseterminals.com/website/index.php?index) will arrange your wedding according to your wishes.
For the past 6 years there has been a program that gives a couple, resident in Barbados, a chance to win their dream wedding and honeymoon absolutely free of cost. Couples must show evidence of their intention to be married in order to enter the competition as well as to receive the prizes of the competition. Visit the website (http://www.nationnews.com/ForeverIDo/index.php) for complete information.
The three common themes to wedding customs are tradition, ethnicity and personal identity.
While weddings are commonplace, each couple creates, changes and re-fashions
their own wedding to reflect their unique circumstances, their cultural, ethnic
and religious backgrounds and their personal wishes to have a perfect wedding
day.
Many traditions related to weddings are part of our common knowledge, our
folklore. For example, most brides wear white, step into a church right foot
first to ensure happiness, walk down the aisle with a male family elder, and
wear a veil which was formerly a sign of submission in her new role.
Many folk customs and beliefs related to the wedding day have persisted over time and are passed down through family stories. For example, whoever catches the bridal bouquet will be the next to marry. Other folk beliefs, while seldom believed to be true, continue to be practiced.
Some customs relate to things that cannot be controlled, such as the weather: happy is the bride the sun shines on or rain on the wedding day brings unhappiness. Or if the bride wears something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue on her wedding day, her marriage will bring her happiness.
Wedding cakes remain an essential part of the celebration and there are as many traditions that go along with the cake as there are cakes related to particular ethnic traditions. The bride is never to bake her own wedding cake and any unmarried girls who attend the wedding are to take home a piece of the wedding cake to put under their pillows that night in order to dream of their future spouses.
Today, it is still customary for the bride and groom to take the top layer of the cake home to freeze and eat together on their first anniversary.
The origin of some customs, particularly those of Western countries, are less well known, although practices associated with these customs are common knowledge. The Bible mentions confirming an engagement by the gift of a ring to the prospective bride as a pledge to honor their agreement. History shows that this tradition was carried on in ancient Greece and Rome. It is still customary in contemporary Western society for a new groom to present his prospective bride with a diamond ring as a token of love and a promise that marriage is in their future.
Early European marriage arrangements tended to be based upon economics rather than love and were usually negotiated by parents, being too serious a decision to be left to young people.
In Britain, from Anglo-Saxon times until the mid-sixteenth century, the groom or his family actually purchased his wife from her family and gave money or property known as the wed to the bride's father. This process became known as the wedding. In eighteenth century France, it was customary to pay after signing the marriage contract.
The bride also came with a small bundle or truse from which the word trousseau is derived. The trousseau, or dowry, was a replacement for the declining tradition of marriage by purchase. Even today, one occasionally hears the term trousseau, or hope chest.
Exchanging and wearing a wedding band, still a public symbol of matrimony, is a custom dating back to Biblical times. Exchanging rings confirms the importance of the union. The wedding ring's circular shape suggests that the couple are linked together for eternity. The tradition of placing the wedding ring on the fourth finger of the left hand (as is still done today in the United States) arose from the belief that a major artery ran from this finger directly to the heart.
The honeymoon, which continues to be a time for newlyweds to sequester themselves following the wedding, is actually derived from the word honey. In medieval England, the couple was expected to drink mead, a wine made from honey, in celebration for a month (or moon).
While there seems to be more customs related to the bride, there are traditions related to a groom as well. For example, today as in the past, the groom is certain to select his own best man. Back in the days when brides were being abducted, the best man served as the groom's assistant. This role symbolically continues today as the best man is called upon to assist with the wedding ceremony and is expected to make the traditional toast at the wedding feast.
One important component of the wedding tradition involves events prior to the
wedding. Out of the courtship period when the couples get to know one another
there evolves a personal story: the family courtship story. Through many
retellings this story is shaped into a finely honed tale where "reality is often
transformed into verbal art." As folklorist Steven Zeitlin, notes.
Courtship stories, and, in particular, stories of a couple's first encounter
effect a romantic transmutation of reality. Two persons meet as a result of some
meaningless combination of circumstances... if they find themselves compatible
and get married, an "alchemy of mind" transforms the incident into a rendezvous
with destiny and the deepest sort of romance.
Couples who have celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary needed little prompting to retell the circumstances in which they met.
Ethnicity involves social relationships with members of a group who have a shared sense of identity, history, cultural patterns and styles. These cultural patterns and styles maybe esoteric to a particular group, yet they can be shared in obvious and open ways with members outside the group.
In Lowell, where over fifty different ethnic groups express cultural traditions in a myriad of ways, we can easily forget that people express their ethnicity by choice since ethnicity is an ascribed identity. Members of the group decide for themselves the basis and the extent of their involvement within the ethnic circle. Membership is by descent and sometimes by intermarriage.
When we look closely, we see a blend of ethnic traditions that are often brought
about by intermarriage, immigration, and acculturation. Because of this
combination, brides and grooms feel at liberty to reformulate and reshape their
own ethnic traditions and yet include "American" ones as well.
How does a couple fashion their own wedding so that it reflects their own
personal identities and their identity as a couple? What ethnic touches
might be incorporated into the wedding ceremony, the food ways, and the music,
which are three of the standard components of any wedding?
For the younger couples, creating a wedding
often involved reviving past traditions and shaping them to modem circumstances.
Something Old, Something New: Ethnic Weddings in Greater Lowell, seven couples
of Greater Lowell create a personal wedding day that combines tradition,
ethnicity and personal identity and celebrates their lives together.
Source:
http://library.uml.edu/clh/Wedding/Et.Html
A destination wedding is the choice of the Bride and Groom.
If you want your best friends to attend - i.e. your Maid-of-Honor, Bride's Maids, Best Man, then you have to consult them as they will need time to arrange their vacation at work, to travel as well as take care of any other responsibilities.
Your attendants would have approximately one year before the wedding to decide to attend or not to attend the wedding, as your wedding plans must begin a year before your wedding date.
Remember that you can arrange a post-wedding party once you return home.
You are the 'Hosts' as well as Bride and Groom, so you need to assist your guests in finding accommodation as well as providing them with sightseeing information at the destination. You are under no obligation to pay for any guest's expenses.
A guest, who has accepted your invitation to a destination wedding is also agreeing to pay all of their personal expenses for their trip.
Gifts can be left or sent to the couple's home and not to the place of the wedding, so there's no need to travel with the gift. In our modern times, giving a cash gift is acceptable.
Traditionally speaking:
the Best Man is to attend to the needs of the Groom. At the reception, the Best Man will be the first person to toast the Bride and Groom.
the Maid-of-Honour & Bride's Maids attend to the needs of the Bride.
the Bride and Groom always have the first dance. The father of the Bride will have the 2nd dance with his newly married daughter and the Groom will dance with his new Mother-in-law.
the Groom's parents, and Bride and Best Man would then take the dance floor next with all the guests joining in.
Wedding Planner - Timeline
One year before your wedding there are many decisions to be made:
Maid-of-Honour
Bridesmaids
the Bestman
flowergirls, ring person
bride & groom's outfits
all attendants' outfits
wedding rings
type, theme, place and size of your wedding
time of day
Official who will be performing the ceremony
hall, drinks & caterer for your reception
the photographer
music
honeymoon
your home after the wedding
get enough sleep & exercise
6 to 9 months before the wedding:
check several gift registries and register with at least 2
purchase bride & groom's outfits
ensure that your attendants' outfits are being prepared
ensure that your parents' outfits have been ordered
order your flowers and other decorations
as you receive wedding gifts, make a list and send out thank you cards
4 to 6 months before the wedding:
order the cake and the menu
invitations should be ordered as will you should have your guest list ready
purchase whatever you need for your honeymoon (your trousseau)
get the documents you need for travelling and finalize your honeymoon plans
visit your hairdresser to try different hairstyles. Make the appointment to have your hair done on the wedding day
take the time to test your makeup for the special day
2 to 3 months before the wedding:
invitations should be sent out 4 weeks before the wedding, include map and directions for the church and reception hall
bridal and groom's outfits, attendants' outfits and all other outfits for those in the bridal party, should now be hanging in your closet
finalize your wedding ceremony
One month before the wedding:
purchase gifts for your attendants and others
you should by now, have all or most details completed, i.e. music, photographer, caterer, drinks, hall, church and so on!
If you are throwing a party for your attendants and others, now is the time to have it.
1 to 2 weeks before the wedding:
pack for your honeymoon
your caterer needs to know the correct number of attendees
make up a timetable for the wedding day and give it out
pick up your wedding rings and check the inscriptions
you should the number of tables and chairs as well as seating arrangements
go over with your attendants the roles they will play on your wedding day
It's now just a few days before...
...the wedding. The bride & groom will want to have a facial, manicure, pedicure and complete other personal care items.
A reminder - the Priest/Pastor or other Officiant needs to be paid after the ceremony.
The night before the wedding, get to bed early!
The day of your wedding, all in the bridal party should begin dressing about 2-3 hours before the ceremony...
because you have planned well, the day will be stress-free!
Basic Wedding Planner
Wedding Consultant:__________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Name & phone#:____________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Clothing & Personal Care:______________________________________________________________________________________________________
Bride's gown & accessories: __________________________________________________________________________________________________
Groom's attire & accessories: _________________________________________________________________________________________________
Maid of Honour, Bridesmaids, Flower Girls: ______________________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Hair, Makeup & other personal items: __________________________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Phone numbers: ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Flowers & Decoration:_________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Bride & Groom's: ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Flowers for others: __________________________________________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Church & Reception room: ____________________________________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Phone numbers: ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Marriage Licence:_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Address & Phone #:__________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Jewellery:____________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Bride & Groom's: ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Gifts for attendants: _________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Phone numbers: ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Music: ______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Phone numbers: ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Photography:_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Phone#: ___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Invitations: ________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Thank you cards: ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Note:All thank you cards must be handwritten, do not pre-print!
Postage: __________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Phone numbers: ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Cake/Caterer:________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Name & phone # (s): ________________________________________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Reception Hall: _____________________________________________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Food & Drink: ______________________________________________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Staff: _____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Transportation: ______________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Vehicles for Bride & Groom: __________________________________________________________________________________________________
Others: ___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Phone numbers: ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Church or other:______________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Priest/Pastor/Other: _________________________________________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Honeymoon: ________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Accommodation & airfare: ____________________________________________________________________________________________________
Meals: ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Tips & Miscellaneous: _______________________________________________________________________________________________________
Transportation: ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Travel Documents: _________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Phone numbers: ___________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Special Parties:______________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Luncheon: _________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Dinner: ___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Stag, shower, etc.: _________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Drycleaning:_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Bride & Groom's: ___________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Phone numbers: ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Miscellaneous:
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Poems Of Love
This poem was written by my father (deceased) to my mother, I believe, before he went off to WW II. They were married for more than 60 years until his death. I don't know if this poem was copied. It is typed exactly as he wrote it.
To My Wife
I know a little girl
Whose face is sweet and kind
She is the gentlest in all the world,
And pure as the rustling wind
Her heart was young and tender,
And filled with high ideals,
Where one may meet homage render,
For it no ill conceals
Her eye is filled with innocence
And child-like tenderness,
A light there shines whose radiance height
Will dark things put to utter flight
I love her dearly, truly
I give my heart to her fully,
And there it will stay in safety
Without one fear from me.
Till I return, be of good cheer,
For you are the one, thy little Dear!
God keep you.
Ivan 24.3.44
Live, live with me, and thou shalt see
The pleasures I'll prepare for thee:
What sweets the country can afford
Shall bless thy bed, and bless thy board.
The soft sweet moss shall be thy bed,
With crawling woodbine over-spread:
By which the silver-shedding streams
Shall gently melt thee into dreams.
Thy clothing next, shall be a gown
Made of the fleeces' purest down.
The tongues of kids shall be thy meat;
Their milk thy drink; and thou shalt eat
The paste of filberts for thy bread
With cream of cowslips buttered:
Thy feasting-table shall be hills
With daisies spread, and daffadils;
Where thou shalt sit, and Red-breast by,
For meat, shall give thee melody.
I'll give thee chains and carcanets
Of primroses and violets.
A bag and bottle thou shalt have,
That richly wrought, and this as brave;
So that as either shall express
The wearer's no mean shepherdess.
At shearing-times, and yearly wakes,
When Themilis his pastime makes,
There thou shalt be; and be the wit,
Nay more, the feast, and grace of it.
On holydays, when virgins meet
To dance the heys with nimble feet,
Thou shalt come forth, and then appear
The Queen of Roses for that year.
And having danced ('bove all the best)
Carry the garland from the rest,
In wicker-baskets maids shall bring
To thee, my dearest shepherdling,
The blushing apple, bashful pear,
And shame-faced plum, all simp'ring there.
Walk in the groves, and thou shalt find
The name of Phillis in the rind
Of every straight and smooth-skin tree;
Where kissing that, I'll twice kiss thee.
To thee a sheep-hook I will send,
Be-prank'd with ribbands, to this end,
This, this alluring hook might be
Less for to catch a sheep, than me.
Thou shalt have possets, wassails fine,
Not made of ale, but spiced wine;
To make thy maids and self free mirth,
All sitting near the glitt'ring hearth.
Thou shalt have ribbands, roses, rings,
Gloves, garters, stockings, shoes, and strings
Of winning colours, that shall move
Others to lust, but me to love.
These, nay, and more, thine own shall be,
If thou wilt love, and live with me.
Robert Herrick
Among thy fancies, tell me this,
What is the thing we call a kiss?
I shall resolve ye what it is:
It is a creature born and bred
Between the lips, all cherry-red,
By love and warm desires fed,
And makes more soft the bridal bed.
It is an active flame, that flies
First to the babies of the eyes,
And charms them there with lullabies,
And stills the bride, too, when she cries.
Then to the chin, the cheek, the ear,
It frisks and flies, now here, now there:
'Tis now far off, and then 'tis near,
And here, and there, and every where.
Part your join'd lips, then speaks your kiss;
And this Love's sweetest language is.
With thousand rare encolourings;
And as it flies, it gently sings
Love honey yields, but never stings.
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